sweet slumber

Yesterday? was like the best day ever. Why? because it was "operation sleep while she sleeps." Eew, I kind of hate that I called it "operation." So everyone says to sleep while the baby sleeps. Which I always thought to be a fabulous idea in theory, but a total joke once attempted. Joke is on me. I got more sleep yesterday than I have during the last 7 weeks and it was glorious. Now let's not get this confused, it wasn't anything near pre-Sydney sleep, but that? Is a thing of the past, something I can't allow myself to think of because, well, it's just too painful to remember those sleep filled days. Those celeb followers out there: have you ever noticed that they are always talking about hanging out in their bed? They hang out with friends, eat, watch TV, etc in bed. This always seemed completely ridiculous to me, because no doubt they have a giant house with amazing furniture and plenty of rooms to entertain in, so why would the bed become the hub? Regardless, I thought I'd give it a shot. After  all, if it works for Chelsea Handler and Kourtney Kardashian, it surely must work for me. But seriously, I literally camped out in our bed all day and only got up to feed the lady, feed myself or move around a bit to prevent bed sores. It was pretty wonderful. Highly recommend, even if you're sans child. 

Highlights of late include:

• Pumpkin Pie milkshakes at Red Mill. O.M.G. do it now. Seriously, you will thank me later.
• Smiles from my darling dear. True "I see mama and love her" smiles! The other morning I was changing her mid slumber and she opened her eyes, saw me and immediately began smiling and cooing. melt. 
• All baby Halloween party. See pics below. Ridiculous.
• Amazon allowing dogs to go to work. Thus Kirby spending some quality time with Evan during the day. Awesome on all fronts.
• Creating a night time routine. Give it up for bath time! My mom said she bathed us every night and it was her most favorite thing and now I shall be adding it to my list of favorite things (along with all things Marc Jacobs, said pumpkin shakes, baking, yoga, lipgloss, etc.) Sydney loves it and it's a great time for the three of us to have some QT
• Continued shopping for the little bee. love. I mean, you're welcome Old Navy (never thought I'd say that). But really, they have the cutest clothes! like this deer sweater?http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?userSearchText=oh+deer&pid=262420012.  Yeah, I know. It's the latest addition to Syndey's wardrobe.
• Homeland. I've boarded the train and it's left the station. While Claire Danes would never make my list of Top 10 Celebrities to play me in a movie of my life, she is legit. Netflix it now. 
• Our first trip back to Starbucks for a meet and greet. It was really great seeing my friends and catch up with them! Although the thought of actually going back to work to, you know, work makes me ill, I find solice in knowing I get to return to those gals. 

mommy and me twins. I swear this is a one time occurrence. (unless of course that deer sweater comes in my size...)

kicking it with Belle

mom, you ain't no anne geddes! now get me out of this pumpkin

okay, it's not so bad

our other bee

1 month (belated)

Our little bee turned 1 month on October 11th and I'm sitting here wondering where in the world time went! Weren't we just leaving the hospital, baby in tow, heading bright eyed into parenthood? Never in my life has a month passed so quickly. Where was this kind of time passage when I was little, anxiously awaiting Christmas, or hell, even graduation from high school? This is where life plays an evil little joke. Those things that you want to quickly move through just drag...and drag...and drag some more. But those that you want to pause and savor every single second seem to just disappear before your eyes. I'll stop there before I wind up sobbing over the keyboard, but really, it ain't cool.
This past month has been a dream. Literally because we've sleep-walked (pretty sure that's not proper grammar, but anyways...) through the entire thing, but also because it's been as wonderful as the best dream one could imagine. I never thought I'd be one of those gushing moms, but at the end of the day, this gig is pretty sweet. Every single aspect of it I love. Who would have thought?  Over the past month, I've loved more than I ever thought possible, stared at one person more than should be legal, changed more diapers than hours I've slept, watched more TV than any doctor would recommend in a lifetime, smiled more than Biden during the VP debate (marmarmar), sang more Tom Petty's "American Girl" than he probably has and been happier than I thought possible. All because of one little lady.
But enough about me! Over the past month we've seen so many changes! She now recognizes our voices and faces and "tracks" us when we're in the room with her. Big milestone, people!  She also is wiggling more and exploring the way her limbs move. She smiles a lot, which those cynical moms say is due to gas, but who cares the reason! A smile is a smile from that little face and we'll take it. I must say, if they are "legit" smiles, she's got a great sense of humor.
She's making more noises, experimenting with sounds and even coos a bit when she seems happy. We're also seeing a lot more of her baby blues and that? Is the best. Being able to look into her eyes and really connect with her is just an incredible experience.
And finally, as noted in her stats above, she's flourishing! A great eater like her mama and daddy, she's eating regularly and growing, growing, growing. Yay for healthy baby, boo for being out of newborn diapers and clothes. And to the next stage we will progress.

1 month and it feels so good:

Yellow jeggings...are you kidding me?

I had a similar reaction to this 1 month milestone

straight exhausted

l.o.v.e.

football schmootball. but daddy is pretty great

hey pumpkin

Oh pumpkin patch, how I love thee. Seriously, this time of the year, there is absolutely nothing better than pumpkins. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin bread, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin beer, pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin patches, etc. (hopefully you read that with a Bubba Gump accent...if not, re-read). I literally cannot get enough. And that means, Sydney can't either. In fact, her poop is pretty much always orange. Sure, that's a common color for newborn bm's but I'm also convinced it's due to mama's pumpkin addiction. Anyways, back to the story at hand...the pumpkin patch! Saturday the Steppan clan made the trek to Spooner Farms in Orting and had a grand old time. Granted, Sydney was passed out the entire time, but it didn't stop us from using her as the cutest prop you could ask for. See pics.

Showing off her pumpkin pj's

g,g and belle

nice view, mama

belle the pumpkin

laid back

wake me when the photoshoot is over

Cheeks

pause.

Well we are approaching our first month with our precious little lady and life has never been sweeter. Never could I have ever imagined the capacity of love I would feel for this little being. She has completely taken over our lives and hearts! We are still in shock that she's actually ours! Evan was holding her the other day and said to me "I can't believe we don't have to give her back. She's ours!" How lucky did we get? It just melts me.
I can't believe it's already been a month. It all is so clear now when moms have said that time goes by so fast. I get it now, and quite frankly, I don't like it! How I would love to pause this time where we just hang out and snuggle all day. Where I don't need to worry about sleeping schedules or starting bad habits. Where it's completely ok to let her sleep on me all day (I've had numerous books and blogs give me permission that it's ok at this stage). I know there is  so much fun ahead, but it tugs at my heart to think that these days are numbered.
Although I must admit, as she starts to track us with her eyes and smile (I don't care if it's gas) and be more alert throughout the day, it's exciting to think about each milestone that lies ahead.

Of course, we have approximately 5,396 pictures of Sydney at this point, but here are some of my favorites:

First Bath!

loving snuggles with Kirby

Go Griz!!

true love

the arrival part 2

Pushing began around 4:15AM and from what I hear, it was pretty textbook for a first time mom with an epidural. I must say, numbness in ones legs is the most bizarre feeling in the world! Thankfully I had my wonderful husband and a great nurse to hold up the ol' dead legs or else things would have gotten real interesting. Of course pushing was exhausting and I just couldn't believe that any progress was being made. Finally, towards the end, I caved and let them bring in a mirror, which actually helped. Never would I have ever thought I would want to see the actually process, but it ended up being extremely helpful to see what progress I was making after nearly 3 hours of pushing. And finally, by 7:07AM on September 11th (which just so happens to be Auntie Dana's birthday as well!), we had learned that the precious little bee was in fact a precious little baby girl. Weighing in at 8.3lbs and 20.5 inches long, she was simply perfect and we were done for. Words simply cannot describe that moment when you hear your newborn baby's cry for the first time. Never would I have imagined the sweet relief, love and emotion I felt at that time. After 9 months, our baby finally made her debut and life would never be the same.
She was immediately put on my chest and stayed there for about 45 minutes. The human body is truly miraculous. Just her nestling on my bare chest helped regulate her temperature, circulation and senses. The simple physical contact with her mother (me!!!) was exactly what she needed to thrive in her first hours in the world. I still cannot comprehend the bond that we share and that my simple touch can provide those essential benefits for her.
We stayed in the hospital for another 24 hours, which was quite a blur. Family and friends came in and out to visit, but all Evan and I could think about was getting home with our little Sydney and beginning life with her.
I feel so fortunate to have had such a straightforward labor and delivery but couldn't have done any of it without Evan's love and support. He has always been my rock and strength (sorry, that's so cliche, but true) and this was no exception. He jumped right in like a pro, knowing exactly what to say and exactly (mostly) what to do to keep me going. Not only has he been every bit the husband I devoted my life to, but he has already proven to the most caring, gentle, head-over-heels in love father. Sydney, Kirby and I are truly blessed.

This mama is overcome. This is what life is truly about.

the arrival part 1

Bear with me, I must share the story of Sydney Mae's arrival:

After a long day starting with a walk, dropping Evan off at work (his first day at Amazon, btw), a trip to Lynnwood for Babies R' Us and Target, followed by the baking of pumpkin bread and the beginning of pumpkin cookies, I decided to rest for a bit before heading down to South Lake Union to pick Evan up from work. Just hanging on out the couch I was wrapping up a conversation with Sara when not 10 mins after our convo, at 5:26pm I felt a surge of liquid! And by surge, I mean surge.  Springing from the couch I raced to the bathroom and confirmed, that yep, in fact my water did just break. Doesn't this only happen to 10% of women? Typically the doctor has to break the waters to get the show going. But naturally, I would fall in that 10%.
I immediately called Evan and then proceeded to keep calling, and keep calling him (8 times to be exact), and finally, followed up with a text that said "My water broke, call me!" (mind you, we had the whole "you HAVE to have your phone ON and by your side at all times just in case" conversation) While waiting for him, I called the doctor and my mom, both with the same message, I think my water broke... (as if there really was any question about it). But because I wasn't having contractions, the doctor ordered me to go for a long walk and call her in two hours. In the meantime, Evan was en route (chauffered by his new manager). Once he got home, we hit the sidewalk with Kirby and walked it out. Stopping for a quick bite to eat, the contractions began and we were on our to having a baby! Around 7:30, I called Dr Emanuel to give her an update and she said to make our way into the hospital around 8:40. At this point, the contractions were becoming a bit more regular, so we pulled out the yoga ball and started bouncing (whilst watching Real Housewives of NY, of course).
At 9:00 we checked into the hospital and things started happening. To get my contractions moving along, we walked the halls of the hospital (straight out of a movie). Then at 11:30 we finally measured to see what kind of progress I was making and was at about 4-5 cm. Things continued to progress pretty rapidly from there. by 1:30AM I was 7-8 cm dialated and in need of a nice little epidural. Of course, going into this experience I wanted to keep my options open and see how long I could go without meds, but as I've said a time or two before, no one is winning any awards for going meds free (God bless you women who do it). Thus came the epidural and oh sweet Jesus, sweet relief. By that time, my parents and Dana had made their way to hospital and it was time for all of us to get in a quick nap before push time.

week 38

Prior to the arrival of our perfect little bee, I had made some notes about things I wanted to write for week 38...this is as far as I got. The info in parenthesis is my recent elaboration.

last day of work
(it was pretty anti-climatic. worked a half day, the scooted out to a doc appointment. adios mr. schulz. see you in a long while)
pumpkin patch with belle (cannot wait to visit the pumpkin patch with my niece and our baby!)
santa pics (see above- cannot wait for cousin holiday trips)
inlaws (Evan's parents came into town for my 2nd baby shower. So great to see them and share the experience with Deb)
doc appt (Baby was slowing down on growth and measuring almost on schedule- ha! At the very latest, we would induce on the 26th- ha again)
Shower (I had the most wonderful shower on the 8th, hosted by Connie and my Aunt Linda. It was full of family and family friends and such a wonderful day! We are so blessed to have the incredibly loving and thoughtful people in our life)
bff bday (not much to say here, as little miss Sydney hijacked Dana's day)